A not-so-warm welcome

I’d hate to fill the lawnlocker with firewood only to have you move on

DEAR Winter,

NICE to see you could make it.

You certainly made a grand entrance this year, dumping certain areas with metres of snow. I guess you were making up for the late arrival.

Do you intend on staying long? We all know it’s up to you as to how long you linger but some kind of indicator would be nice.

I’d hate to fill the lawnlocker with firewood only to have you move on, and be left with a perfect home for snakes to take up residency.

I see you’ve brought with you your usual baggage of flus, colds, snot and cold sores.

Just leave them out there if you don’t mind - it’ll be better for all if we’re not tripping over these as we get through the next couple of months together.

Now that you have rocked up we can all get on with enduring you.

Yes, that’s right, putting up with you. I know, it’s not exactly an “arms open” sort of reception but you bring that on yourself.

No offence but the sooner you leave, the longer our days become. I mean that in a physical sense too, not as in “we won’t have anything to do without you”.

We’ll have plenty to do. Firstly we’ll welcome our other mate Spring in for a while before his cousin Summer drops by for about three months.

They just seem more good-time oriented than yourself. You probably get that a lot I suppose.

Sorry, but that’s just the general consensus. That’s not to say having you around doesn’t have its advantages.

After all, when else are we able to have bonfires and wear flannelette shirts with plaid slippers without scorn?

Your welcomes have been a bit frosty in the past but we aim to not give you the cold shoulder.

Looking back, I’ve been harsh on you so what say we start afresh?

I’ll pop the jug on and break out the Iced VoVos.

The Iceberg LettersDear readers - the majority of an iceberg sits below the surface, and it may just take one special letter to see what else lurks under the tip of a topic.


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